My Life ( Shrugs )

 Everyday felt like heaven to me. The love my parents would give to my brother and i was such a blessing, in my eyes we were the happiest family ever known. I grew a few years in a neighborhood called StoneWick. Its actually right beside my school i attend now. But anyway, so many memories are still surfaced around that there everytime i think about it. I havent been there in so long. Its like a happy memory i go to everytime i feel as if i need a good thought to think about when im down about something in my day. Like Building my first snowman , and getting lost in my own backyard, and most definetly the bad snow storm in 2003. Woaaah - that left alot of people without power and transportation. To a little girl like me , seeing this action take place was like seeing a winter wonderland. Gosssh , you should have seen the look on my brother and my faces when the snow fell peice by piece to the ground and started to add color of white to the street. Ohh' how we cheered. We couldn't wait to get outside and play with some of the neighborhood kids and challenge some of our friends to a good ole' game of snow ball fight. Memories like that carry in my head forever.

Sooner or later , summer came around the corner , and school was finally out. That meant more time for playing games and watching movies and junkfood. Summer for me was perfect.. but not as i exspected. One day i came home from school with my brother , and we walked in on a arguement with my parents. We were so young , we didnt know what was going on. We sat and watched as tears rolled down my mothers face and anger rage on my fathers. They didnt even notice to see we were standing in the room, so we both walked away hope'n the would stop and notice that we didn't like when Mommy & Daddy fight. For a few days i blamed myself for why my dad was leaving. I never even knew what divorce meant? My father is a firefighter , i thought he was leaving for work with his clothes and bags. I can remember so many boxes sitting in the living room stacked on top of each other. My father caught me staring at them. He looked down at me like he was going to tell me something, but i saw water feel his eyes like cloudy skies above, and he walked away. That day, my father left. He kissed my brother and i on the top of the head, and whispered to my brother to watch after my mother and i because he was the man of the house now. He nodded and went on his way.

As days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, i started to get the picture that things have changed. My mother would sit in silence sometimes in her room. The feeling of your mom laying on your shoulder asking for help is a feeling alot of people dont have in their lives you know? This is actually the first time i am expressing my feelings about this memory i kept locked away in my heart, but something happend. One bright day i woke up and told myself you need to forgive and forget in order to move on right? I told my mother about how i felt and she smiled and told me to call my brother into the living room. We all talked for hours, she told us never let someone still your joy from your life. "You Got That"? She said to us sternly, we nodded our head and said Yes Mama. After that day, there was no more sad faces, or moods. We actually smiled and laughed again. We realized that life has trials and tribulations that everyone has to go through, and that one was one God gave to us to get through.

As my brother and i grew up, we realized that God has everything happen for a reason, and we are always going to make it. you just have to keep your head up you know? Thats what makes me such a strong person today, and why i am always smiling, if you haven't noticed. Lol, Im so blessed in my life. I might not see it as cleary as other, but its turning into a clearer vesion. Im just glad i have life , family and joy in my days. Im living my life to the fullest and not turning back to relive the past that i already accomplished to get by. Thats just my thought on life.

Thats just me... Lexus Sy'mone Miller.